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TalesFromTheFringe


 Some Headlines......
 




.....CHRISTIANS PREPARE FOR COMING RAPTURE.....AGAIN.....

.....GOD SIMULTANEOUSLY KILLS THOUSANDS OF CHILDREN AND SCORES EVERY TOUCHDOWN IN THE NFL.....

.....TWO LOCAL WOMEN'S CONFLICTING PRAYERS CANCEL EACH OTHER OUT....THINGS STAY THE SAME.....

.....RENOWNED FAITH-HEALER FALLS ILL.....

.....EVANGELICALS STONE WAYWARD CHILD TO DEATH.....CELEBRATE WITH A METH FUELED HOMOSEXUAL ORGY.....

.....MORMONS MAKE A BID TO PURCHASE SCIENTOLOGY.....SPACE WAR FEARED....

.....CHRISTIANS CELEBRATE AS "THOU SHALL NOT KILL" IS REPEALED.....

.....MIKE HUCKABEE RIDES A DONKEY TO PUBLIC APPEARANCE.....

.....FIRST AFRICAN AMERICAN ELECTED TO MORMON "12 APOSTLES" RULING BODY.....ELDERS SAY LONGTIME MORMON JERRY INGRAM IS "ONE OF THE GOOD ONES".....

.....MAN SEES IMAGE OF VIRGIN MARY IN BLOOD SPATTER AFTER BLUDGEONING HIS WIFE TO DEATH.....

.....SUICIDE BOMBER HOLDING OUT FOR THREE MORE VIRGINS.....NEGOTIATIONS AT A STANDSTILL.....

.....HEALTHY 30 YEAR OLD WOMAN DIES SUDDENLY....GOD BLAMES SCHEDULING SNAFU.....

.....FORMER CHIN OF JERRY FALWELL FOUND IN WAYSIDE BATHROOM FELLATING A GOP CONGRESSMAN.....

.....MANY CHRISTIANS WORRIED ABOUT BOTTLENECK AT PEARLY GATES AS RAPTURE LOOMS.....

.....POPE QUITS! SAYS "FUCK THIS SHIT!".....

.....ALL RELIGIONS COALESCE ON THE NEED FOR WOMEN TO REMAIN SUBSERVENT.....WOMEN WERE NOT CONSULTED......

---------

Never trust whitey,

theblaast,
citizen
Posted by theblaast at 11:44 AM - 3 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 The Walrus
 



By no means a perfect man....but a man with unique talent, a man who loved the human race, and a man who actively sought peace. A man who changed the world.

No wonder he was murdered....

Salud, John.



Where is our John Lennon?

Here I stand, head in hand.

theblaast,
citizen
Posted by theblaast at 9:48 PM - 9 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Happiness Is A Warm Gun.......
 

THE GEORGE BAKER SELECTION.....



So fuckin cool....



E-LOIS

BUC WHEEL, CHAIRLIFT--STOMPER.

SAND.

---------

Theme song from the t.v. show "Rawhide", thank you.

theblaast,
citizen
Posted by theblaast at 12:21 AM - 6 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 THESE FUCKS REALLY THINK WE ARE STUPID....ARE WE??
 

Karl Rove is now claiming that the reason we went to war with Iraq when we did is because the congress voted on the resolution too soon. That's right, it's congress' fault. Rove goes on to lie some more by claiming that the Bush administration did not want the vote to become political, as it was September 2002, with the elections in November.



ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?

This santorum sucking fuck and the rest of the Bush crime family are not just dirty politicians, they are criminals, sociopaths, and pathological liars.

These people are so out of touch with reality. There is an enourmous amount of evidence against Rove's latest big lies for the public to see. Just go to whitehouse.gov, where I got this little headline:

PRESIDENT URGES CONGRESS TO PASS IRAQ RESOLUTION PROMPTLY
Semptember 24, 2002.

Not to mention the wealth of information that has surfaced about the administration's almost hysterical RUSH to war OR the administration's complete politicization of EVERY aspect of government.

Just forget about that though, Karl is telling you the TRUTH now. Well, in snippets, because he's got a book to write.

I hope he goes to jail. I hope they all do.

And for all of you small minded, lock step repubs that lambasted Clinton for a blow job and still support the criminal Bush.....You are truly dense.

Two trillion in debt
9/11
More terrorists than ever before
Lied into Two wars
Maybe three
Katrina and New Orleans
Illegal spying and wire taps
Suspension of Habeus Corpus
The Patriot Act
The Military Commissions Act
Oil
War Profiteering
Tax cuts for the rich
Huge Corporate welfare
The US attorney political firings
The destruction of our good name
The destruction of trust
The destruction of our government
Voter supression
Feel free to add your own....

....And coming this spring....

Suspension of democratic government
Martial law

In the words of Sgt. Barnes in "Platoon" when he finds Manny tortured and killed by the creek bed.... THE MOTHERFUCKERS!!

THE WORST PRESIDENT EVER.....EVER!

GEORGE W BUSH IS A SIMPLE, SPOILED, PETULANT, IGNORNANT, CRIMINAL!

SUCK IT BUSH LOVERS, APOLOGISTS, AND SUPPORTERS.

I curse you all with elephantitis of the genitalia so you cannot reproduce and chronic halitosis so you must smell your own lies.

HAVE A NICE DAY!!

Your gentle scribe,

theblaast,
citizen

Posted by theblaast at 9:53 AM - 12 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Nonsense At Night
 

Here at TalesFromTheFringe, I have made it clear that I despise religion, all of it.

Well, this is a picture I took of my room last night as the middle finger of the lord penetrated my life.


Yeah, I got a nice place.

I was fast asleep, dreaming of porn and the ACLU like any good secular liberal, when our room was filled with a bright white light. I woke immediately while J remained in a fitful sleep. The light was brighter than anything I had ever seen. Brighter than a monk fire, but not as luminous as an innocent woman burning at the stake. Strangely, I had no discomfort looking directly at it. In fact, I couldn't look away. I felt the abundance of god's love in that light....and it made me feel ignorant and scared....but in a blissful kind of way. Instantly, a warm wave of baseless superiority washed over me. Was I in the presence of god?
After a couple moments, a voice called my name. "blaast", you have been chosen". The voice was gentle, yet assertive, not the the booming baritone with a hint of menace as is portrayed in the movies. It was more like the practiced tone of a veteran serial killer.
The voice said, "Take these to the people, for these are MY true sacred laws". I was mesmerized as two tablets appeared before me. On each tablet, god had written the "sacred laws of man", five on one, five on the other. Needless to say, I was inclined to do what the light said. I asked god how to get the word out, after all, I'm not Moses...or Fox News. He told me to use thefringe. With a bow, I told him it shall be done.

Imagine my surprise that god chose me. I'm not an alcoholic or drug addict, and I have never been in prison. I'm not a racist, homophobe, politician.... nor a gambling addict or ex-porn star. Mysterious ways I guess. I no longer question.

I apologize for all of the venom and vitriol against religion and god, for I have been saved.

Here are the true laws god gave to me, to give to you.

THE TEN

1. Thou shall not question
2. Thou shall not be curious
3. Thou shall force your opinions on strangers with prayer cards
4. Thou shall support war
5. Thou shall at least consider violence when others disagree
6. Thou shall inhibit peace
7. Thou shall hide your homosexuality by hating
8. Thou shall indoctrinate not educate
9. Thou shall be wary black and brown people, wherever they may be
10. Thou shall remain scared

I have done what the good lord has asked. Thank you oh lord, for preying on my fear of the unknown, narrowing my views, and relieving me from the burden of thinking.

The first thing I'm going to do is get two tats. A full back "God, Guns, + Gays" tat and a WWJK(Who Would Jesus Kill) Celtic wrap on my thigh. After that I think I'll be ready to try and join some christian organizations. I don't know what kind of vetting process each of the following groups demand, but here is my wish list:

The Benevolent Order Of Clinic Burners
The Republican Party
The Science Deniers
The KKK
The Boy Scouts
Marksmen for God
My local chapter of Hate Your Way To Heaven
Separate Separation of Church and State
The Belligerent Bible Boys
People Praying For Profit
The Crusades Re-enactment Society

-----------

God bless you all.(unless your not American, white, or straight)

I once was lost, but now I'm bound.

theblaast,
citizen

Posted by theblaast at 10:33 AM - 12 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
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